Today beat me up, shoved me to the ground and called me a w-e-e-n-i-e. The day began at 7:50 this morning and is just now coming to a god blessed close. At least I hope. I’m pretty sure I could bet you one hundred dollars that I will be cleaning bodily fluids throughout the night and come out the winner. I don’t even have a hundred bucks to bet and I would still bet you!
And that statement right there sets the tone over the last 13 hours of this cra-zy day. In fact, I sent a text message to my friend Crystal around ten this morning:
Get this. Rori’s diaper leaked on the couch so I took her to the kitchen to clean her up when Scout runs in screaming about his mouth and throat. I pick him up but he is fighting me and screaming a fit so bad that it would make a two year old blush. So anyway, I take him to the trash can where he starts to puke. However, that freaked him out even worse–he tried to runaway which led to a huge puke scene all over the dang floor and himself. So now I have a whole new mess to clean! So I start with him, then the throw up. Then I clean Rori and get her changed. Then I scrub the sofa. Then I clean myself. Bubba is so lucky he works on days like this.
Now put this scene on repeat, add a whole lot of diarrhea and you have my ENTIRE day. I was fed up with it all by the time Bubba came home and I told him that for once I wish he would be stuck with sick kids by himself and do nothing but clean their mess. I say this because Bubba is NEVER home when the kids are sick! Ever! (That’s a whole other whine fest)
Anyway, I left for the gym to blow off my day. Forty minutes into my workout I receive this text from my husband:
Payback was sent. I started to make dinner and Scout and Rori started fighting over the bathroom. Scout was already in there and I told Rori to wait just a minute and I hear a huge fart. Rori is like, “GROSS” and opens the door to find that Scout somehow exploded all over the toilet seat AND the side of the toilet, AND the floor AND the wall. Not much on him though. Almost like he blew right before sitting down. Then I inadvertently clogged the toilet by using TP to clean the mess right away. Wow. It really blew up on me fast.
Poor kid repeated that episode two more times before finally falling asleep. (Despite my day, my heart can’t help but ache for the little ones when they’re sick) I hope he feels better tomorrow. He obviously has some sort of virus. Hopefully I can keep it from spreading to anyone else in the house too!
Clean, clean, clean.
I almost forgot to tell you the event that broke this camel’s back. I bent over to pick up a bottle of shampoo and threw out my back. I’ve been sitting here on the couch with a heating pad wondering if I will be able to walk when I try and get up. Back pain is no joke!